I Tink, Therefore I Am

Life has a lot of rules. One of them is that you don't get to choose a nickname, such a moniker is usually thrust upon you by others. Depending on how those others feel about you, the nickname could have positive or negative connotations. Even someone who loves you dearly can hang a name on you that sticks that you despise. Or one that you grow out of, yet those who know you persist to address you as such to your chagrin. I've had nicknames over the years, but none of them has grown beyond use by just one or two people. I remember my mom calling me little pretty until I was five or so. My brother Cullen had the habit of coming up with a new one for me every few weeks. Jose. I still have no idea why. For a while, my first two initials, CJ, which then devolved into Jeep. Preppie Girl. Sissy. Then there were the mildly pornographic cutesy ones bestowed on me by boyfriends, which I shall not share. For several years now, to a select group of people, I have been known as Tink. I met this guy at an open mic who used to write a blog. Many people he mentioned by their actual names, but if you were really special, he referred to you with a nickname. While I am not blond and do not possess wings, this is the brief conversation that caused him to call me Tink:

So, Carla from Brookings, what is special about you?

Excuse me?

What's special about you, what makes you different from everyone else in the room?

I have a dragon tattoo, I'm a writer. I don't know, I knit backwards.

You what? Like, you're unraveling?

Well, no, when my Grandma taught me how to knit, I sat facing her and copied what she did. So I mirrored what she was doing and what I made ended up opposite, or backwards from what she made.

Hmm. Knit backwards. Tink.

Later, when I started reading his blog, I left a comment as Tink, and immediately others leaving comments knew who I was, as did he. It was fun. I had an alter ego. I met some interesting and cool people. His blog no longer exists, at least if it does, I haven't seen it since he shut down his band's website a couple of years ago. I'm still Tink, though. I have a teensy TinkerBell pin on my jean jacket. I've always had an affection for fairy lore, so my nickname fits right in. There was an original song that his band played that was a personal favorite of mine, and more than once they played it when I was in attendance. He'd introduce the song, saying, Tink, this one's for you. And I'd hear people around me murmur, who is she, anyway? I'd just smile.