Dear Verizon

I am deeply saddened and disappointed over your decision to discontinue your New Every Two plan. Perhaps it was too popular, thus hastening its demise. I remain steadfast in the belief, however, that it is patently wrong to offer a phone for ninety-nine cents and then proceed to charge said potential buyer of the ninety-nine cent phone thirty dollars (thirty dollars!) for "upgrading" to said ninety-nine cent phone. There are no other available options for the ninety-nine cent phone. This, people, is not a ninety-nine cent phone. It is a thirty dollar and ninety-nine cent phone. $30.99! I was not born yesterday and my sense of smell is intact and fully functional, as are my basic math skills.