Dear John...

How could I have so thoughtlessly forgotten your birthday yesterday? Please forgive me, I will make it up to you. I hope you had some cake and were celebrating among friends. You remain my primary crush that I worship from afar. Nathan Fillion, Kyle Chandler and that half dressed fellow in the Old Spice commercials mean nothing to me. Allow me to wish you all the best in the coming year. And until we actually meet in person, I'll get by with multiple viewings of High Fidelity, Must Love Dogs, Serendipity, America's Sweethearts and Grosse Pointe Blank. Until then, I remain your ever loyal fan and servant who respects your personal boundaries and all current protection orders.


With adoration,
Bellona