Monday, March 16, 2015

Amused & Bemused

The title describes moi. We could continue through the alphabet with calculated, debarred, effusive, facile, gauche, and so on, to describe the particular situation which unfolded Saturday evening. But I'll get to the point instead. My phone twirps its text notification tone. I check my messages and discover a request from a friend to host a backyard fire. Since I was four hundred or so miles away I declined. Perhaps a bit abruptly but I was hanging out with the AndiGirlz in the midst of Pi(e) Day activities with Courtney and Royce. I generally respond to text messages right away or I have a tendency to forget, so in the interest of rejoining the people I was actually with I texted back and set my phone aside. I didn't give it any more thought until Facebook revealed to me that this friend, plus a few others, had attended an activity together earlier on Saturday. An activity I had been included in a year ago but had not been invited to this year. I vaguely remember mentioning the Pi(e) Day road trip well over a month ago to this group. But that leaves me wondering. Hmmmm. If they remembered I was going to be out of town, that's a very reasonable explanation for being left out of St. Paddy's Day festivities on Saturday. But if I was gone, how could I possibly host a fire pit party? On the other hand, if they deliberately excluded me, isn't it just a bit nervy to invite themselves over afterwards? Just after receiving the text concerning the fire pit party, I got a text from another member of the group inquiring about getting a drink somewhere because he was bored, likely a group message sent to several of us. Was the group text meant to cover their faux pas? I don't know and it's not likely I ever will. Things have been a little chilly lately in this group of friends, I have only been out with them one time thus far this year. The last couple of years nary a week has gone by without getting together at one of our homes or out for drinks. Maybe it was just a case of poor communication, that's what makes the most sense to me. I'm not one to see a conspiracy around every corner which is why I find myself amused. My experience with groups like this in the past has demonstrated that like yogurt, they have an expiration date. Maybe not clearly stamped on the container but things do change. When one thing lapses, other things rise up to take their place. Or it may be that new opportunities present themselves and old diversions are abandoned in their favor. I don't like to think of people as opportunities or diversions, I prefer to think of such bonds as something deeper and more meaningful. Whatever is going on here, I don't take it personally. I accept the fluid nature of life for what it is without demanding explanation. 

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