Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Emotional Erosion

I have gushed before over how much I adore the very smart, funny, and straight-to-the-point advice that columnist Carolyn Hax delivers. Today's answer to a nit-picking husband also included a comment from a participant in the online discussion. 

As a person on the receiving end of this constant oversight, I can tell you the drip drip drip of disapproval is eroding you wife's affection for you.......You've been warned, husband. Find a way to appreciate her ability to get things done or someday she will leave you.

Yes, she will. I know because I did. Reading these words today helped put to rest one more tiny bit of unresolved baggage. There was no huge blow-up or defining moment or unforgivable incident over the course of my twenty year marriage. There was simply this awakening to the fact that the years of asides, couched humor, and criticisms had left me numb. I so desperately wanted to feel something again. And I sadly resigned myself to the knowledge that the something I longed for would never again be love and affection for the man I was married to. That was ten years ago. It got better. I'm still here. It's a process. Thank you, Carolyn.

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