Tuesday, January 28, 2014

A Peek at the Peak

My cranky hands have been much better today. Primarily due to the fact that I have done very little with them the last couple of days. This is called resting. It's effective but you have to be in the proper mood for it to work well. Meaning that sub-zero temps outside and movies inside have made this down time possible. I have noticed since the beginning of the neurological pain manifesting in my hands and wrists that alcohol facilitates the process of typing due to the fact that it knocks back the pain to a tolerable level. Halfway into a glass of wine and keyboard and mousing activities are a breeze. The tricky part is maintaining that sweet spot in the blood alcohol level range. By the time I'm well into the second glass my hands are nimble as all get-out but my thought process is not so clear. I can type but the product isn't nearly as clever as I think it is. Reid has suggested that I'm trying to achieve something called the Ballmer Peak. That elusive blood alcohol level that for me combines maximum relief with a degree of mental acuity that would render me capable of holding down some type of office job. Not quite enough booze and my hands don't cooperate. Too much and I'm stupid. Not that I've found a workplace lenient enough to allow an adult beverage at your desk even if the Ballmer Peak could be proven beneficial for productivity. All I know is, when it comes time for clinical trials I will offer myself up as a research subject. And hope like hell I don't end up in the control group that gets a placebo.


AndiBean said...

Has no one in the career rehabilitation center realized that Certified Bar Wench is the PERFECT placement for you? Oy vay.

Bellona of Avalon said...

Aw, you're just saying that!

Am I qualified for such a position?