Minimal to the Max

Whoever said size isn't important didn't know what they were talking about. And no, this isn't going where you might think it's going. My hair, for instance, gets big without encouragement. I do not require a voluminizing product. Though at least a half dozen beauticians have really wanted to sell me such a thing. I tell them, I don't need a voluminizer, I need a whip and a chair. They use one on me anyway and I can't see where it makes any difference, except to make my hair feel stiff and crunchy near the roots. Then there's the minimizer bra. Reduces your bust by one full cup size! Wouldn't that be a pint? A bra that makes your bust smaller is not something I require, either. I prefer a bra that imparts a certain uplift, one that puts the girls right back where they were when I was nineteen. I do realize that there women out there who are the diametric opposite of me in these two regards. And I feel their pain. Because size does matter. Especially when we are born with traits that we would prefer had manifested themselves a little more in the other direction. So I'll take the anti-frizz, curl relaxing hair products and the push-up bra, thank you. Which leaves more of the voluminizers and minimizers for the rest of you.