Where the Heart Is

I've had to consider this one for a few days. On the surface it wouldn't seem so meaningful, but like an Indigo Girl, there I go digging too deep, I always do. Some dreams are so very real in nature and set in such familiar locales that it feels like you have been there in the flesh rather than just the neurons. Thursday morning I woke just a minute or so before the alarm went off. I blinked myopically a couple of times and thought it was odd that the closet doors were closed. Normally, the closet doors are closed! It was the startling electronic beep of the clock that made me realize I had been dreaming. About cleaning out that very closet. Allow me to explain. For four years now, I've been sleeping alone in what is chauvenistically referred to as the master suite. I tried calling it the mistress suite, but somehow that doesn't sound quite right either. But I digress. It is a bedroom built for two with a private bathroom and his and hers closets at either end. The hers closet being just ever so slightly larger. It started out a whole lot larger than the his closet when I was designing the floor plan, but when I decided I needed, yes needed, the larger bathtub separate from the shower, some closet space had to be relinquished. When my soon-to-be ex-husband moved out four years ago, he vacated the his closet. And since nature abhors a vacuum as well as unused closet space, over the ensuing months my stuff migrated over to eventually fill the his as well as the hers closet. In my dream, I wasn't merely purging unwanted clothing and footwear from the his closet space. I was clearing it out, leaving it completely empty. Just before I woke up, I was standing back, pleased with my efforts, the closet doors flung wide open to reveal the available space within. Which was why I was surprised to see the doors closed when I awoke. So I'm left with wondering if I need to actually physically remove my things from that space, or if it's enough to recognize what I now realize. Instead of the full moon madness, full-tilt exhausting dreams that I normally experience, I've had a gentler, more revealing peek within my own head. And I think I just might be telling myself that it's time to receive. This is a blue moon month, and I believe something extraordinary could happen, something I wasn't ready for until now. My heart, and my closet, are open.