Sorting the Sordid

Minding my own business on a Saturday morning, drinking coffee, sorting the laundry. I always check the pockets, I absolutely hate when a stray kleenex in a pocket, invariably in a dark load, leaves its shredded aftermath all over the inside of the washing machine. So I check. This morning I found kleenex, two shopping lists, a dime, a worksheet, five bucks and a condom. The kleenex and lists I tossed in the trash, the $5.10 I pocketed in the pants I was wearing, the worksheet I set aside to ask the 17yo about, and the condom...the condom!. From the jeans pocket of the 21yo. He claims it was forced on him by some liberals in Nebraska. I decided to keep it. I felt a little racy all day carrying it about in my purse. It's kind of cute in its crinkly little package. Oh, and it's a friendly shade of bright green. The package is stamped with an expiration date of May, 2013. With any luck, maybe I'll get to use it before it goes bad. Until then, if you see a woman with a wild gleam in her eye, it might just be me. Just your average condom-packing goddess.