I should be shredding. There is a preposterous pile of personal papers a mere five feet away from me. Utility bills, old credit card statements and statements from retirement plans whose funds were long ago rolled over into what is currently shrinking rather than growing. And I would be shredding except for the fact that Newton is comfortably dozing on the ottoman just across the room. And he's so darned cute in all his tigercat snoozing glory that I can't bear to crank up the shredder and disturb him! You evil, evil furry little beast! Distracting me from important tasks while you incipiently practice mind control. You do not need a belly rub! Not, not, not! Damn! Once again, I have been beguiled by feline trickery.
I've not met Newton, but even I know that he NEEDS a belly rub. Remember, you are a member of his "staff". Get on it!
ReplyDeleteOkay, I'll rub his belly. But I will not paint his toenails! You gotta draw the line somewhere.
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