Confessions of a Recalcitrant Goddess

Soup

2012-02-11T15:10:00.002-06:00

It was cold last night. How cold? I don't know the number. It seems that when we get down to single digits, the batteries freeze up in the sensor unit of my digital thermometer. Despite the fact that I forked over the extra cash for the lithium batteries that are recommended for the extreme weather conditions. Not to mention that they'll last 4x longer! That's a quote from the packaging. I expect they might last longer, if only because they're in cold storage. The point is, when it's cold outside, I am often inspired to make soup. Chicken tortilla soup, to be precise. Warm, spicy and delicious. Makes a cold night just a bit more tolerable.

Observation

2012-02-11T12:07:00.002-06:00

It's interesting how you still must file with the IRS even though, technically, you have no income.

How Shocking!

2012-02-09T11:41:00.002-06:00

Yup. This pretty much sums it up for me. Nothing like a simple graphic to concisely explain a concept. One that some find difficult to comprehend. Any questions?

Yesterday's Lunch

2012-02-09T11:15:00.006-06:00

I know. It's fuzzy. I really must take my camera along to lunch so I don't have to resort to my phone camera when the food is unexpectedly beautiful. This was the most colorful lunch I have experienced in my entire life. Cream of asparagus soup. Baby greens, sliced tomato with a tangy vinaigrette. And hiding under the top half of the bun is a luscious crab cake topped with purple cabbage slaw. It was delectable. The perfect condiment on the side was some kind of horseradish-ey, garlicious, mayo based tartar sauce that I could have eaten with a spoon. I refrained from licking the last vestiges of it from its cute little cup. Self control is overrated.

The Twos Have It

2012-02-07T15:41:00.003-06:00

Today is the second day of the second week of the second month of the second year of the second decade of the second millennium. Sorry I wasn't paying attention to this numerical oddity at 2:22:22 this morning. Maybe it's a day for second chances. Second thoughts. Revisiting that which is not settled. Twice is nice. Love is always better the second time around. Put on your pink tutu and dance!

The Not Starving Artist

2012-02-07T10:23:00.001-06:00

The worst part about whipping cream is when you have to lick the beater. I like to think I suffer for my culinary art.

Startling Revelation Deux

2012-02-06T14:59:00.004-06:00

At last! Everything is so much clearer now! Tigh has explained to me that I am actually a gay man who is trapped in a woman's body. No wonder I'm fabulous! No wonder I can decorate! No wonder I can distinguish an Anjou pear from a Bosc or a Bartlett. One thing's sure. I need to work on my abs.

Startling Revelation

2012-02-06T11:01:00.003-06:00

Oh! I get it! He doesn't like me! And he was either born without a sense of humor or had it surgically removed when it became inconvenient! This explains so, so much! I thought he was just a jerk! Excusez-moi!!

Not So Scary

2012-02-05T15:00:00.002-06:00

Compared to what might have been under the fridge, what I found was mostly ordinary. Residing with the mother of all dust bunnies in the western hemisphere were the following items:

Bottlecaps!

1 beer

1 iced tea

1 orange juice

3 water

8 milk

16 soda

1 toothpick

1 baby aspirin

1 coax -> USB connector

1 small purple faceted plastic bead

1 computer keyboard G key

1 2.5 inch metal spring, likely from a bi-fold door

1 French fry (I think)

1 clothespin

2 mini Christmas ornaments, one star, one snowman

Roku Love

2012-02-04T12:16:00.004-06:00

I have a serious relationship with my Roku. Roku brings me Netflix. Which brings me Captain Reynolds. I admit it, I love my Roku. Which is why I was dismayed to discover that my Roku remote, or RoMote, as I like to call her, seemed to be malfunctioning. New batteries! She needs new batteries! A fresh pair of AAA's did not help. I emailed the Roku people with a description of the problem. I had a reply within three hours! Since I am still in warranty, they are sending me a new RoMote! The unfortunate thing is the Roku itself has no buttons on it. Meaning that if I wish to watch tv in the next few days, I must resort to what is available from my pitiful antenna or my personal dvd/video library. Which means I will be fine, shed no tears for me, I have placed this situation in perspective. I can stream Netflix on my computer as well as on my shiny new Chromebook if I become desperate. Then there's this thing called interaction with other people. In person. Being social. I've also been avoiding cleaning my refrigerator. Inside as well as out. And since the cats were both crouched down and peering intently under the fridge a couple of days ago, I expect I should move it away from the wall and see what might be lurking under there. I am afraid.

The Bright Side of Life

2012-02-03T21:46:00.003-06:00

In my continuing effort to broaden my younger son's horizon as well as further his classic comedy education, tonight we have viewed Monty Python's Life of Brian together. It has been years since the last time I viewed this rather silly movie. I had totally forgotten that it features full frontal nudity of both the human male and female persuasions. Albeit brief. My 19yo and I have viewed a pickle shot together. And remain pretty comfortable with each other. Proper comedic (ahem) exposure as well as motherhood are not tasks for the faint of heart. And yes, since you asked, this is what attractive single mothers do on Friday night.

Reg Redux

2012-02-02T11:38:00.002-06:00

My phone rings. I look quizzically at the screen. Not in my contacts. I answer anyway, mostly because I've had great fun lately reporting telemarketers to the FCC. Somehow they have gotten hold of my cell number, which by the way, is on the Do Not Call List. But it's not an offer to refinance my home or sign up for a new credit card. It's Reg. He was on I29 and saw a sign for Brookings. Made him think of me. We talked for fifteen minutes or so. It was comfortable. Pleasant. No plans were made, no offers extended. Nothing that I must decide. I don't know what it means. Maybe something. Maybe nothing. What I do find interesting is that while I deleted all traces of him from my phone, he clearly kept my number. And I'm annoyed with myself over how I have allowed him to addle my brain once more. The feathered thing flies, it seems, whether you want her to or not.

Five!

2012-02-01T17:33:00.004-06:00

Don't know how this one slipped by me, but yesterday was my blog birthday! Yes, indeed, we are five years old. I have nineteen followers! Warmest thanks to those of you who drop by to see what's on my brain, or perhaps what my brain is on at the moment. Even warmer thanks to the ones who comment so I know what's on their brain. Make a wish and blow out the candles!

Anticipation

2012-02-01T17:20:00.002-06:00

I am on the brink of old lady-hood. That horizon is nearer every day. I have decided to embrace this imminent state of being and have discovered that I'm already exhibiting some hallmark behaviors. Like hauling out my little zippered coin purse in order to pay in exact change. I'm nearly gleeful about it if I hold up the line for just a few seconds. I believe it was Bette Davis who said getting old wasn't for sissies, so I intend to make it more about being sassy. But I'm holding the line at two cats. For now.

UPS Logic/Case Logic

2012-01-31T12:11:00.003-06:00

Why did my notebook case leave Addison, Illinois to spend the weekend in Hodgkins, Illinois only to return to Addison before departing for Sioux Falls, SD? Maybe Hodgkins is a way shiny place to spend a weekend. I've never been there so I really can't say.

6,991,376,479

2012-01-31T10:38:00.002-06:00

According to the U.S. & World Population Clock, today's title is how many people are sharing the Earth with me at this moment. I expect I'm included, so I suppose it's more accurate to say 6,991,376,478. Although it's also likely more than one child has been born in the three minutes or so since I started this post. At any rate, I'm in the ballpark since the clock does say (Est + 5). My point is, that is a very large number. And I am personally acquainted with a tiny percentage of that very large number. So why does it regularly surprise me that given there are only 365 possible birth dates, 366 this year as it's leap year, that I know several people who share the same birthday? Today, January 31st, is the birthday of four people I know. My father, my cousin Kris, my Darling DIL's friend Catherine, and my ex's older brother. The interesting thing is that my Uncle Ken's birthday, Kris's father, is tomorrow, February 1st. Now consider the post-divorce rancor my mother held toward my father. So she mentioned to her brother that it would have been nice if Louise, his wife, could have waited to give birth for a few more hours so Kris would share his birthday with his dad instead of her former husband. Ken smiled and said that in the moment, he wasn't about to bring up the subject of prolonging the birth process with his wife. My Uncle Ken was a smart man.

If You Cantaloupe...

2012-01-30T10:31:00.004-06:00

I've been thinking about the various applications of a safe word. Other than the bondage variety, which is where my pottybrain has a tendency to immediately go. When choosing a safe word, the more obscure the better. Makes it less likely that it would crop up in casual conversation. But there's a fine line if you must employ the word when others are present, you need to be able to work it in without being obvious. I must credit Jacquelineand for dislodging this story from wherever it was hiding in my brain, because it's funny and ought to be shared. Even if you weren't there. But particularly so if you know the women involved. It went something like this...my friends Jeany and Lee Ann are sisters. They were invited to a family function, a baby shower or something, that they weren't thrilled about attending. They need to at least show up for a while and agreed that when one of them mentioned the word cantaloupe, they would make their apologies and be on their way. To complicate the matter, there was a table with quite a spread of goodies on display. A decorated cake, cookies, fresh fruit. Including cantaloupe! At this point in the story, depending upon which sister is relating it, the roles become disputed as to who said what and when. This is what's really funny if you hear them tell the story, how they argue back and forth about the details. Right up there with Englishmen and croquet. But I digress. One sister becomes involved in chatting with the other guests and completely forgets about the significance of saying the word cantaloupe. This goes on for close to an hour, and the other sister is more than ready to vacate the party. After casually mentioning cantaloupe several times without the desired reaction, she employs an improvised Plan B. Loading up a plate with cantaloupe, she sticks it right under her sister's nose, asking her with much more volume than necessary if she wouldn't like some damn cantaloupe! To which she replies, no thanks, you know I don't care for cantaloupe. Then makes a face like, you're my sister, you know I don't like cantaloupe, how could you not remember that!...then laughs uproariously because she remembers their plan. Safe words. Choose them carefully.

Esther's Grandchildren

2012-01-29T15:48:00.003-06:00

Esther, my maternal grandmother, had two daughters and two sons. To those four children were born eleven grandchildren, seven boys and four girls. I'm not certain how far she was into the grandma game when this charm bracelet was a gift. One charm for each child engraved with their name and date of birth. I am just as uncertain as to whose idea it was to present Grandma with such a gift. It doesn't seem likely that Grandpa would have, my best guess is that my Aunt Mamie, mother of Clay, Cory, and Sara, is responsible. She lived in the same town as the grandparents while her siblings were scattered across the country, and it just seems like the kind of thing she would do. I chose it from among Grandma's remaining belongings that were stored in Aunt Mamie's basement. I was surprised it was still there, it isn't a valuable piece of jewelry, except in the sentimental sense. It still annoys me just a little that my sister Martine's charm is etched with the name Marty! She was never called Marty, and if she was, she didn't answer. My mother wasn't happy about this either, and I remember her discussing it in hushed tones with Mamie. The excuse I heard was that the jeweler said her name was too long to fit on the charm. I find it odd that two years later Sara Kay was made to fit on a narrower charm! It would be so interesting to know that particular story but I expect it followed Mom and my aunt to their graves. I have worn it a few times and my wrist was left with a greenish brown smudge, I suspect it doesn't agree with my particular body chemistry. So I hung it on the twig shelf in my bedroom that is home to all sorts of memorabilia. In a sense the twig shelf is an altar. The photos, jewelry and trinkets represent people and things I'm keeping in my thoughts for one reason or another. To help me hold those I love and special memories of them close. When my cousin Chris died I tied a tiny black ribbon on his charm. When my brothers Scott and Cullen passed I did the same with theirs. Eight of us survive and there are at least ten great-grandchildren I know of, the most recent addition in just this last week. Sometimes I wonder who will cherish and possibly wear this bracelet long after I'm gone. I can envision a young girl finding it in a basket of costume jewelry in a second hand store. She makes up fanciful stories surrounding the names on the charms. And enjoys the tinkling sound it makes when clasped on her wrist. She places it carefully on her nightstand before she turns out the light at bedtime. This makes me smile.

Crush of the Week

2012-01-28T19:43:00.003-06:00

Given my recent torrid watching of the Fox series Firefly and viewing its big screen follow-up, Serenity, I with no hesitation whatsoever cop to a major crush on actor Nathan Fillion. And by torrid, I mean less than three days for all fourteen episodes plus one two hour film. Which likely means that I have gazed upon Nathan's handsome visage for more collective time than the last guy I dated. I have no idea what that means. At any rate, he is gorgeous whether all cleaned up as in the photo at left, or whether he is an absolute bloody, staggering mess after having survived an entanglement with some arch villain or other. I do have a weakness for pretty boys who make me laugh. At any rate, I may have a chance with him as he has been described as a notorious bachelor. Although it is more likely I will have, in my inimitable fickle way, moved on to some other crush by the time he reads this. Nathan, sweetie, leave a comment anyway.

Serenity

2012-01-28T17:36:00.002-06:00

As in the movie based on the tv series Firefly. I know I'll have much, much more to say about this in the future. But all I have to say for now is, the phrase safe word has a whole new meaning for me.

Case Logic 11.6" Netbook Sleeve Model QNS-111, In Magenta

2012-01-26T22:58:00.004-06:00

Naturally, the first thing I had to buy for my Chromebook was a case. In this case (hahaha), a pink one. So I can take her with me to WiFi coffee shops. Or lurk out on the street in my car skating off an unsuspecting resident's wireless signal. It's all about the accessories, that's what I always say. I love New Egg!

Never Again!

2012-01-25T21:33:00.002-06:00

This is my mantra....never again shall I engage in internet dating...never again shall I engage in internet dating. And so on. I felt myself nearly getting pulled back into the vortex with this little bit of flawed thinking. That perhaps Internet Dating Website XYZ is actually better than Internet Dating Website PQR because of the interesting questions they ask that will reveal your true personality/nature/sexy beast that will in turn have you booked up with amazing and wonderful dates for weeks! Well, a pig in a dress is still a pig. Meaning that internet dating is, in essence, hanging out in a virtual bar. Except that you don't have to dress up and leave the house to do it. Immersed in the comforts of home you can sit in front of your computer in your pajamas and have meaningless conversations with men while you're perusing their profiles. You find out what they are interested in letting you find out and really nothing more. I have discovered that the local electronic pool just isn't large or diverse enough to be interesting or worth the effort. Not that I expect to find a suitable man sitting on the actual barstool next to me. While I enjoy the electronic neighborhoods of Facebook, Google+, and this blogging community, there is really nothing more satisfying than rubbing elbows with real people in the real world. Eventually, you have to do that anyway.

Mystery Package

2012-01-25T14:15:00.006-06:00

Einstein checking out the mystery package

Oh! I suspect this is an electronic toy!

It is! It is!

This is so cool!

I wish I could tell you that I'm blogging from my new toy, but I still need to establish a cloud account to store photos. I have posted to Facebook! Sometimes when Santa shows up a month late, it's most definitely worth the wait! Thanks to Michael and Liz, my Beamish Boy and Darling DIL.

Aurora Forecast

2012-01-24T22:35:00.003-06:00

Powerful storm activity on our sun = pretty lights in our northern skies. If it had been one of those near zero frigid sort of days we likely would have had a clear night. Alas, temperatures warmed a bit leaving us with horizon to horizon overcast. I've observed the Aurora Borealis here in SD only a couple of times before and really hoped to camp out in my backyard to watch for the lights. Maybe drag my son out to witness the Goddess's fireworks. Even the moon cooperated! But the clouds did not.

Ginger Peachy

2012-01-23T17:17:00.002-06:00

A gorgeous catalog that shows up in the mail with a free tea bag! I ask you, what's not to love about that! Thank you, Republic of Tea. My favorite is British Breakfast with two sugars and cream. Makes winter bearable.

Hoya carnosa

2012-01-22T18:39:00.003-06:00

Just in case you might be interested, this is what the blossoms on my hoya look like. They range in size from just under half an inch like these are to giant varieties where the individual flowers are nearly the size of your hand. Most commonly they are from pink to purple in color, but there are also white, orange, green and yellow varieties. There is even a hoya with red, heart shaped flowers! The flowers are interesting in that they look fake, like someone snuck into your house and hot glued some little plastic fuzzy flowers onto your plant. I must admit that I swiped this photo from a horticulture website. You can be sure I'll post pics of my own when a bloomin' miracle occurs!

The Little Hoya That Could

2012-01-22T14:16:00.002-06:00

It's been nearly six years since I disposed of my mite-infested hoya plant. This is what has grown from the small cutting that started out with fewer than ten leaves on a couple of twining stems. She hasn't bloomed again, not yet, but maybe this spring she will. That is, if she thinks she can.

Look! Something Shiny!

2012-01-20T23:50:00.003-06:00

How does this thing work? Have I exposed myself to some horrible, toxic, gene-altering chemicals? Just to have pretty nails? As if I wasn't with the nail polish and acetone laced remover.......which brings us back to the beginning. After years of wearing latex and nytril gloves at work, my nails had become rather dull and listless looking. I resorted to a coat or two of natural toned nail polish a couple of times a week. A bonus was that my nails were somewhat protected by the polish, they didn't wear down as quickly from certain tasks, the polish wore down instead. Then I was locked into this cycle of remover-polish-remover-polish-remover, well, you get the idea. Then last week, I picked up one of these four-sided nail buffing blocks. For just a couple bucks. Each side is one step of a finer-than-the-last mildly abrasive surface. The fourth side is totally smooth, sort of like vinyl flooring. That final surface renders the nails shiny! Amazingly shiny as if a coat of clear polish has been applied. All for about a 15 minute effort while watching a movie. Almost magical. Though I don't know how long it will last. The shine or the buffing block. But if using it can get me out of the polish/remover cycle for a while that would be nice. The one I purchased is the brand pictured, Ms. Manicure. It's easy to grip and the medium firm foam conforms to the curve of the nail. Even my cranky hands didn't protest too much. One more little step in my quest to be just a little lower maintenance.

The Long and Short of It

2012-01-19T18:30:00.006-06:00

It's a stay inside day. Do laundry. Trim your toenails and apply a new color. As I was walking about with my jeans rolled up, so as not to interfere with the nail polish drying process, my brain wandered off to warmer days when the pants are always shorter. Then I considered how many names there are for those below the knee, above the ankle casual pants that I favor when it isn't winter. I do realize that fashionistas, in whose realm I do not claim membership, will insist that these different names entail minute differences in style and length. If there is a regional term I have missed, please leave a comment. This list deserves to grow.

* Capris

* Pedal pushers

* Clam diggers

* Gauchos

* Crop(ped) pants

* Floods

* High-waters

* Three-quarter shorts

Meet SO & PI, the PA Sisters

2012-01-19T10:58:00.004-06:00

SOPA and PIPA were in the news pretty much all day yesterday. I was plugged into NPR while I was variously engaging in and avoiding housework. This isn't a word for word quote, but I enjoyed it:

Suing Google for a user that engages in piracy makes about as much sense as suing Ford when the bank robber's getaway car is a Mustang.

I imagine we haven't seen the last of SO and PI. Instead of tackling real issues in this election year, our esteemed lawmakers in Washington will likely engage in more distractions of this ilk. It's funny how they decried any sort of Internet censorship in China and Iran, yet introduced such a law themselves. I guess if it's under the veil of greed, aka protection of intellectual property, it's okay.

Twins?

2012-01-18T11:18:00.002-06:00

That's my son, Reid, on the left, at approximately one year of age. And on the right, moi, at about the same age. Just thirty-five years apart. Those eyes! Those chins! All that wacky hair! It's like looking in the mirror.

Wine List. Sort of.

2012-01-16T23:03:00.004-06:00

Extension cords required for this year's Christmas lights -- 7

Inches of snow outside -- 2 and counting...

Pairs of black boots I have -- 6

Framed items on the wall in my office -- 12

Framed items sitting on shelves in my office -- 19

Penguins in my office -- 16

Polar bears in my office -- 15

Other assorted bears -- 8

Barbie dolls -- 11

Dirty coffee cups -- 1, from this morning

Wine bottles -- 1 empty, 1 full, 2 total, yes, we're still in my office

About the wine bottles. In May of 2009, my friend Deanna introduced me to Layer Cake malbec, a very wonderful red wine. Later on that summer, Colleen showed up with a bottle of merlot. The brand was Cupcake. I wondered it this was a trend, wine bottlers giving themselves bakery item names, so I hung onto them thinking a collection would be amusing. They gathered dust. No other pastry-monikered wine bottles joined them. I recycled the bottles. Then, in October, Colleen dropped by with a bottle of Lust. Really. From the Michael & David winery, it's a very special appellation of zinfandel. So I'm saving it to share with someone worthy of Lust. It seemed a little lonely up on the shelf in my office, so I put an empty Menage a Trois bottle up there to keep it company. It may be a while til someone who is truly Lust-worthy comes along. Now it really feels like there ought to be three bottles up there...

Now that I have put away the heaping pile of stuff that had amassed on the dining room table, the number of extension cords required has increased to 9.

Movie Music

2012-01-14T11:03:00.003-06:00

Soundtracks ought to fade into the background, if you ask me. The music should enhance the story, really the entire viewing experience, but never overwhelm or distract from it. Since I tend to view favorite movies multiple times, the music emerges a little more and I'm more aware of the connection between the songs and the story. Sometimes I know I want the soundtrack after the first time I see the movie. I just realized this morning that I own three movie soundtrack cd's as well as the movies from which they are taken. Oddly, none of them are musicals. Interesting in that each soundtrack contains a song performed by a character in the movie. I highly recommend all of them.

* Michael (1996)

1.	Through Your Hands - Don Henley [4:18]
2.	I Don't Care If You Love Me Anymore - The Mavericks [3:07]
3.	Chain Of Fools - Aretha Franklin [2:46]
4.	Bright Side Of The Road - Van Morrison [3:45]
5.	Heaven Is My Home - Randy Newman/Valerie Carter [3:07]
6.	The Spider And The Fly - Kenny Wayne Shepherd/James Cotton [3:50]
7.	Feels Like Home - Bonnie Raitt [4:36]
8.	What A Wonderful World - Willie Nelson [2:14]
9.	Love God (And Everyone Else) - Al Green [4:16]
10.	Sittin' By The Side Of The Road - Andie MacDowell [2:18]
11.	Spirit In The Sky - Norman Greenbaum [3:59]

* High Fidelity (2000)

1.	You're Gonna Miss Me - 13th Floor Elevators [2:28]
2.	Everybody's Gonna Be Happy - The Kinks [2:18]
3.	I'm Wrong About Everything - John Wesley Harding [3:36]
4.	Oh Sweet Nuthin - Velvet Underground [7:27]
5.	Always See Your Face - Love [3:21]
6.	Most Of The Time - Bob Dylan [5:03]
7.	Fallen For You - Sheila Nicholls [3:16]
8.	Dry The Rain - Beta Band [6:05]
9.	Ship Building - Elvis Costello [4:53]
10.	Cold Blooded Old Times - Smog [4:12]
11.	Let's Get It On - Jack Black [4:27]
12.	Lo Boob Oscillator - Stereolab [6:36]
13.	Inside Game - Royal Trux [3:42]
14.	Who Loves The Sun - Velvet Underground [2:46]
15.	I Believe (When I Fall In Love) - Stevie Wonder [4:51]

* Love Actually (2003)

1.	Jump (For My Love) - Girls Aloud [3:40]
2.	Too Lost In You - Sugababes [5:45]
3.	The Trouble With Love Is - Kelly Clarkson [3:06]
4.	Here With Me - Dido [4:17]
5.	Christmas Is All Around - Billy Mack [3:27]
6.	Turn Me On - Norah Jones [2:53]
7.	Songbird - Eva Cassidy [3:29]
8.	Sweetest Goodbye/Sunday Morning - Maroon 5 [3:54]
9.	I'll See It Through - Texas [2:16]
10.	Both Sides Now - Joni Mitchell [4:11]
11.	White Christmas - Otis Redding [3:40]
12.	Take Me As I Am - Wyclef Jean/Sharissa [4:13]
13.	All I Want For Christmas Is You - Olivia Olson [3:49]
14.	God Only Knows - The Beach Boys [2:34]
15.	All You Need Is Love - Lynden David Hall [3:43]
16.	Sometimes - Gabrielle [4:29]
17.	Glasgow Love Theme - Craig Armstrong [4:05]
18.	Pms Love Theme - Craig Armstrong [2:15]

For Triskaidekaphobics Only

2012-01-13T20:55:00.002-06:00

In honor of Friday the Thirteenth, I give you a photo of Einstein. Black cats, thirteen, it's a theme. I'm not throwing caution entirely to the wind, mind you. No hats tossed casually upon beds nor salt spilled without tossing a bit over my left shoulder. Fear not, Saturday the Fourteenth isn't far away.

Cold!

2012-01-13T11:13:00.003-06:00

It took its time getting here. For which I'm grateful. An ideal day, in my estimation, to remain indoors and do something productive. Like laundry. Or packing away the Christmas decorations. That are still hanging around like uninvited houseguests that refuse to leave. Alas, I have errands to run. Due to the cold, I shall opt to drive rather than run them.

Food + Wine = Bliss!

2012-01-12T20:30:00.003-06:00

Jessup Cellars produces some pretty darn tasty wines. And I should know. I got to sample some of their product last night at the Old Market. If you look closely at the photo from the event, you can see part of the back of my head and part of my left shoulder. I love it when a random photographer gets my good side. Since I neglected to grab one of the menu cards I can't share with you which wines went with what foods. I can tell you that I was very surprised to discover that a zin goes remarkably well with pickled things! I was also surprised that my favorite wine of the evening was a cabernet, I tend to lean towards zins and shiraz/syrahs or a malbec when it comes to red wine. I imagine I tend to lean after I've had a few glasses, particularly if I'm wearing heels. But I digress. The food was just as beautiful as it was delicious, my favorite being a melt-in-your-mouth scallop wrapped in bacon. I must say I showed tremendous self control not knocking over the waiter with a trayful of them. As I fell asleep last night I dreamed of doing just that. Grabbing the tray and sneaking off to a corner to have a dozen of those little beauties all to myself. I behaved and limited myself to two. It was great fun meeting the owners of Jessup Cellars and hear them speak with such enthusiasm over their involvement in the crafting of fine wines. All I have to say is, making the world a tastier place has got to be a good thing.

Snow!

2012-01-11T14:45:00.006-06:00

The view outside my patio door this afternoon. The interesting photographic effect on the first pic is due to the rather low tech presence of the cat-clawed screen. Which wouldn't move due to the fact that it is frozen in place. This has been only the second snow this winter that has required shoveling. I do hope shoveling remains a novelty.

Purging a Plague

2012-01-09T17:38:00.004-06:00

Belated thanks to my brilliant Noogler son, Michael, who so very patiently set up a long-distance-technical-something-or-other-thingy last night so he could de-virus and reload crucial programs to my nearly ancient laptop. This took over an hour and a half. It's a good thing I'm his mom because I probably couldn't afford his hourly rate. We were on the phone as well so chatting with him and hearing about the dog's antics were most enjoyable. I am also grateful to my local brilliant son, Reid, who saw that something bad was happening a week ago and supplied me with something called RKill that made my computer operable again, though we weren't certain it was completely fixed. Finally, I am grateful that we age at a different rate than electronic contraptions. Leaving me, at 54, mellowed like a fine wine, while at 6.5, my computer is doddering at the edge of obsolescence.

TwoFers

2012-01-09T17:08:00.002-06:00

I do love The Writer's Almanac. It shows up on a daily basis in my email inbox. Inspiring, entertaining, educational. You can even click on a button to hear it out loud in the voice of Garrison Keillor. He relates a story or two on the significance of the day in history and literature. Like whose birthday it is or what may have been published or celebrated or occurred on this very day. Then he reads a poem. Sometimes a poem written by one of the day's birthday honorees. For some reason, The Writer's Almanac has been showing up not once but twice the last three days. This makes me feel special even though I'm sure it's happening to more than just moi. Even though I really only require one of them. Twofers! Welcome to the happy hour, or day, of writing!

FridgeWorthy

2012-01-08T15:33:00.003-06:00

Just when you think you've seen everything, one of the girls brings a coloring book and crayons to the bar. So we colored! In the quasi-darkness semi-illuminated by red and gold tinted lights. Skewing our color sense in ways that alcohol further enhanced. As Emma established, there is only one rule concerning what sort of coloring book is bar appropriate. An overly cutesy one. Explaining the adorable kitties.

Coaster Cool

2012-01-06T20:18:00.002-06:00

Aren't these great? Also funny. Occasionally disturbing, but in a good way. If that's possible. They were also beautifully wrapped, as only Colleen can do. I'm considering another purpose for these lovely coasters...devise a small frame that will hold one and affix it to my office door. Then choose one that conveys my mood of the moment and slip it into the frame. Some days I feel I ought to come with a warning.

Betty Sighting!

2012-01-05T22:30:00.002-06:00

How many times have I seen Body Heat? I've lost count. Many, many times. And swore up and down that housekeeper/glasses thief Betty did not appear on screen at any point during the film! I just completed my quasi-annual viewing of my fave film noir. And there she was. About half an hour into the movie, dinner is served at casa del Walker. As niece Heather is explaining to Uncle Edmund and Aunt Matty just what the rover position is in baseball, Betty is busy quietly serving in the background. Like all good help, she is seen but not heard. For I'm thinking a grand total of ten seconds screen time, tops. I apologize, Mr. Kasdan. Betty does exist. I will never doubt you again.

Wining is Preferable to Whining

2012-01-04T20:38:00.003-06:00

One week from this very moment, this is where I'll be. Here. You should be there, too. It's probably going to be fun. Excuse me while I begin obsessing over what I'll wear.

Bon Appetit!

2012-01-03T23:31:00.005-06:00

Christmas decorations are still strewn about. The lights outside are still glowing, though I promise I'll unplug them before I go to bed. I did thaw the salmon and make a lovely pasta dish for supper. And then I watched Julie & Julia. So much to love! Meryl Streep! Julia Child! Julie Powell! Amy Adams! Food! Butter! Nora Ephron! An unexpected and very touching love story. Cooking and blogging. Writing about cooking. The enormous satisfaction and joy in completing a labor of love. As Paul Child said of Julia, the wife that he held so dear, you are the butter to my bread, the breath to my life. It just doesn't get more delicious than that.

Einstein & Me

2012-01-03T18:11:00.003-06:00

Feeling a little crazy today. Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-changes! Ta-da! New profile picture! I'm not saying I've crossed the line over into crazy-old-cat-lady land. I just like this picture of me with Einstein. Besides, I don't think I qualify with just two cats. I cropped out the champagne bottle and the new year's headgear for use here to make it less seasonal. And I truly enjoy the fact that I am wearing flannel pajamas. My fifth anniversary as a blogger is coming up at the end of the month so I thought I'd shake things up a bit.

Getting Right on That...

2012-01-03T15:36:00.002-06:00

Things I should be doing instead of watching Julie & Julia...

1. Pack away the Christmas decorations.

2. Unplug the outside Christmas lights.

3. Pack away the Christmas decorations.

4. Buy some 40w equivalent cfls cuz the bathroom light is blinding!

5. Pack away the Christmas decorations.

6. Do the load of laundry that involved cleaning up a hairball..oh, wait!..did that!

7. Pack away the Christmas decorations.

8. Take salmon out of the freezer for supper tonight!

9. Pack away the Christmas decorations.

10. Pack away the Christmas decorations!!

UnDecorating

2012-01-02T10:20:00.003-06:00

I love the stripped-down minimalist look to the decor when the holiday decorations come down. That's what I'm up to today. What you see in the photo is about half of what needs putting away. And since I have restrained myself and avoided post-Christmas bargain hunting, I can comfort myself with the knowledge that, indeed, all of this will fit back into the space from which it came. Unless, like most of the rest of us, it has gained some girth in the last six weeks.

Plans

2012-01-01T13:21:00.003-06:00

I love Neil Gaiman. But, alas, he belongs to another. It's less complicated to love his words, so I'll just do that.

NYE at My House

2011-12-31T21:24:00.004-06:00

I'd like mine in a bowl, please.

Happy 2012!!

Why does she get so excited when this thing makes noise?

Miss You, Mom

2011-12-31T09:46:00.005-06:00

Edna Karen Ruud Broome
December 31, 1931 - May 27, 2010

She loved Christmas. And her rickety wood yard swing that she held onto despite the years baking in the Arizona sun that had rendered it unfit for much more than firewood. She loved my father. And despite the fact that they were twice-divorced, I don't think she ever got over him. She cheated death at the age of two when she miraculously recovered from pneumonia. And again at twenty when she collapsed on a Denver street from acute appendicitis while walking to work. I remember her visiting my second grade class, wearing that orange sleeveless dress with the white piping at the neck. Your Mom is so pretty! was what I heard for days afterwards. More than almost anything she loved the fact that the entire world celebrated her birthday. She would have been eighty today.

Illusion

2011-12-29T22:15:00.003-06:00

Sometimes, when I'm sitting very still watching a movie...outside myself and lost in the story and I've had a glass of wine...I'm all nestled into my chair under the big fuzzy blanket...with a dozing cat keeping my feet toasty warm...it isn't until Reid bounds up the basement stairs and looks at me expectantly...and I reach for the Roku remote to pause...moving breaks the spell. My hands feel perfectly normal. Until I need to use them. I imagine it's something like waking up and discovering you're still in jail. You want to pull up the blanket and crawl back inside that dream where everything is fine. Sweet while it lasts but shatters and falls away so abruptly.

Too Good To Be True

2011-12-28T15:03:00.002-06:00

They said it was a pricing error on their website. They apologized and cancelled my order. So, I suggest if you shop here, and run across an unbelievable bargain, it may very well be. I am mildly disappointed. Should they have honored their posted price? They're not legally obligated to. But then there's the other side of the satisfied customer coin. Since a satisfied customer is more likely to be a repeat customer. Like offer me a discount or giftcard to use on a future purchase. Or actually honor the price that they posted. A little good will goes a long way.

Two of Seven

2011-12-28T13:45:00.002-06:00

No, not a Borg designation, which is a reasonable guess. We're talking the Seven Deadlies, as in sin. When asked why we limited our family size to two children, which I thought was an overly personal question from those who had the nerve to inquire, we came up with a clever answer which we were able to recite with a straight face. Well, Michael slept through the night at six weeks, and Reid eats us out of house and home. We thought we'd stop at sloth and gluttony. Who knows which of the remaining five deadly sins we might have produced next! Followed by a Cheshire cat smile. The person who asked often backed away while nodding with an expression of masked horror on their face. If you don't want to know, don't ask, that's what I always say.

Fish Wish Granted

2011-12-27T13:02:00.003-06:00

Santa brought Newton and Einstein a can of tuna for Christmas. I think they enjoyed it. I couldn't get them to look at the camera, they were so focused on their fish.

I doubt they noticed that they were eating off of festive holiday dishes. Presentation doesn't impress felines.

We are Closed

2011-12-25T21:15:00.003-06:00

How can an on-line application page post hours that they are open for business? Why would anything on the web have hours of operation when no direct human contact is necessary? How does this make any sense at all? They did leave a sign on the door:

This service is available during the following hours (Eastern Time):

Monday through Friday: 5:00 AM - 1:00 AM
Saturday: 5:00 AM - 11:00 PM
Sunday: 8:00 AM - 10:00 PM
Holidays: 5:00 AM - 11:00 PM

Pardon me for thinking, but isn't an on-line application process available for the convenience of people at home at odd hours who may prefer to get things done while wearing their pajamas? Will someone who is smarter or who has inside information please explain this to me! Thank you.

Merry Grinchmas!

2011-12-24T18:03:00.002-06:00

Welcome to our formal Christmas Eve. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have dinner to cook. And a bottle of wine is calling my name.

Packaging Poser

2011-12-22T18:52:00.002-06:00

I need scissors to open the packaging on the new pair of scissors. Go ahead and run with them, I'm sure it will be safe. Where's the reciprocating saw? Maybe the blowtorch is better...

It was a Dark and Starry Night

2011-12-22T12:32:00.004-06:00

A Winter Solstice Dream

In these darkest days of winter

The solstice eve draws near

We contemplate all that has come to pass

Anticipate the upcoming new year

Evergreen and holly we invite inside

With their color and fragrance decorate

Reminders that spring will come once more

The seasons’ cycle we celebrate

When sleep steals away your worries and cares

On this longest and starry night

I wish for you slumber, restful and deep

Filled with dreams of comfort and light

I wish for you the waking-world courage

To live those dreams, precious and bold

I wish for you the warmth and love that returns

When given freely and wholly, tenfold

I wrote this poem in December of 2006. It feels like a new years' wish as well, which is also celebrated at the solstice by many. Whatever your particular beliefs or customs are this time of year, I wish you a joyous celebration and that you find yourself among those that you love.

Feeling Un-Friendly

2011-12-21T10:05:00.004-06:00

Phone call last night. Since I had deleted her number from my contacts, I didn't know who it was. I answered more out of reflex than anything. Damn. We were the single girl co-workers who spent a number of evenings out together over a couple of years' time. It was fun, it was certainly entertaining. But there was always some sort of weird drama situation. Progressively the weird drama overtook the fun portion of the evening, and I began to back away from the friendship. Aside from the drama queen goings-on when we were out together, she had a great deal of drama going on in her personal life as well as on-the-job. Circumstances that she seemed to bring on herself and then bemoan the spot she landed in. I was horrified by the way she treated more than one mutual friend. Eventually when she couldn't keep various versions of her story straight, I didn't know when to believe her. A couple of times I questioned her when she contradicted herself and was met with outright hostility. I backed away even further, going so far as to not answer my phone when she called. Then she moved away. At least in part due to her self-inflicted problems at work and at home. I felt a sense of relief. Now she wants to get together next time she's in town and I have no desire to see her. My dilemma is whether to let her calls go to voice mail, lie about not being available for lunch, or be honest and tell her I'm just not interested in maintaining a friendship with her. None of these are appealing choices. If only when you deleted someone's number from your contacts, it auto-deleted from theirs' as well.

This Just In

2011-12-20T21:46:00.003-06:00

It seems that my ex and his girlfriend of six years have decided to get married. No date has been chosen nor any of the other details determined. And I feel a little stunned. I have no lingering desire to reconcile with my ex, it's been over for me for a much longer time than the divorce has been final. I'm actually happy for them. So why do I feel so, well, odd? While this isn't the least little bit about me, I suppose it just points out to me that I am still alone. Still available. Still un-paired. Still hogging the middle of my queen size bed. And I know that it's better to be alone than be in a bad marriage or unsatisfying relationship. Maybe I feel this so sharply because I was so recently reminded of the comforts and joys of being involved with a man when I was seeing Reg. I had almost forgotten.

Let There be Light!

2011-12-20T21:16:00.003-06:00

So I've been annoyed by the tacky brass light fixtures in my bathroom for a while. And I found a very nice black iron three light fixture for over the vanity. Very reasonably priced as well as on sale at Menard's. You would think the next part would be easy. Just a simple, flush-mount (I have to giggle at the mention of flush-mount for a bathroom light fixture!) one or two bulb, white glass globe with the metal in a flat black finish for under twenty bucks. But no! Such a thing does not exist! They have white ones and alabaster ones and ones that come in a rubbed bronze finish. Often they show up as part of a contractor's pack or in packs of two. I only need one! One black one! I was ready to pull down the tacky brass one and have at it with a can of spray paint. But I thought I'd Google the item in mind just to see what might show up. And what should show up after about a twenty minute search but this gorgeous fixture! For twenty dollars and twenty cents and free shipping! $20.20! I wasn't planning on going this fancy but isn't it gorgeous! Cheaper by five to ten bucks than the plain ones! I can't wait to lie back in a tub full of bubbles and steamy water and gaze up at this light. Really, all I wanted was pretty much what I have only in a different color. But this will more than do.

Is Two a Trend?

2011-12-18T16:12:00.003-06:00

Behold! My holiday headgear collection! To help with the holiday mood, pop in the Celtic Thunder Christmas cd, wrap some presents, and don a festive holiday hat! I usually pick up a new one or two in the post-Christmas clearance.

But just yesterday Lowe's already was marking decorations, et al, down 30%! In my walk through I discovered this pink leopard print Santa hat with sparkles in the faux fur trim. It spoke to me. It seems that when you start out with an original price of $8.97, lop off 30%, then add in local sales tax, the final cost is $6.66. I'm thinking of wearing this hat and quaffing a soda!

Miss You

2011-12-17T19:43:00.002-06:00

I suppose it's just the time of year. The feeling of gratitude for what I have in my life as well as longing for what has passed. I miss my mom and my little brother. And I love this photo of the two of them together. It was snapped at my mom's when she was living in Sioux Falls, around 1990 if my memory serves me. More than twenty years have passed between then and now. And it's astonishing to me how much Cullen resembles Mom. And I see and hear them in my own two sons. Comforting that little bits of them live on.

ByeBye April!

2011-12-17T12:44:00.002-06:00

This is April. I stayed out until after midnight with her! We are sad that she is leaving for grad school far away. So we wish her well in this next chapter of her life. Oh, and I didn't turn into a pumpkin! But I will never, ever again eat the hash browns thingy at Cook's Kitchen after the bars close. I have survived it once and do not wish to push my luck. It was the chew-like residue lurking at the bottom of my cup of Coke that nearly did me in. I declined to pay for my beverage, even though the waitress assured me the gunk was likely something in the line that broke loose rather than sabotage. I have now been out on the town two nights this week. Today may very likely be a pajamas day. April, I am placing you in the very capable care of my sis Martine. Enjoy the desert. You will be a kick-ass librarian!

More Jam

2011-12-15T14:11:00.006-06:00

The Hegg brothers, Jon and Jeremy, doing a little sibling rivalry dance around the keyboard.

My favorite bass player, Andrew Reinartz, dreamlike in all that lovely blue light.

The beautiful and talented Allison Mickelson. I feel a kinship with her in that we have both survived North Dakota winters.

The entire Holiday Jam lineup. All nine of them. Is it crazy of me to want to see this show again? I am a Jam Groupie!

Just Couldn't Wait...

2011-12-14T23:36:00.002-06:00

Until tomorrow! The only decent shot I managed at Holiday Jam. That's Jeremy Hegg center stage on the keyboards. Just to the left and toward the dark blue recesses of the stage is bassmaster extraordinaire Andrew Reinartz. To the right on guitar is Xopher Smith. Xopher does a mean rendition of that Grinch song. The one about garlic in your soul. You know, where you wouldn't touch him with a thirty-nine and a half foot pole. Which reminds me of a joke. The punch line of which is, ja, I'm a Pole, but how did you know my name was Walter? Holiday Jam was fabulous. More pics tomorrow. Oh, and I'll never again hear What Child is This without also thinking of bull fighting. Just quietly, though.

Countdown to Jam!

2011-12-14T18:14:00.002-06:00

Holiday Jam, Brookings edition, in 46 minutes! There are still seats to be had! Be there! I will be. And I smell pretty. I thought you might like to know, just in case you're lucky enough to sit next to me.

Bellona's Triangle

2011-12-13T11:59:00.004-06:00

Sometimes it takes a visual to clarify and nail down a thought in the nebulous fog that is my brain. As I was addressing packages to send to my loved ones, which means, yes, I failed to get them sent yesterday, it occurred to me that the points on the map would form a triangle when connected. This was obvious, three points connected always form a triangle. No getting around that. But there it was, near the center of the triangle. The Denver, Colorado area. Where I've been thinking for some time would be the optimal place for me to move. Near a major airport, making flights to the three points in question easily accessible. Hey, even road trips would be quite feasible. I have friends (LindaCo and Deanna!) in the neighborhood. It's beautiful there! Winters are milder! As Deanna would say, I must ponder, plot and plan. First, settle this business with my hands. In the meantime, work on launching Reid. This could most definitely work.

Making a List

2011-12-12T10:45:00.002-06:00

Santa Claus makes a list. Then checks it twice. Proof that perhaps Mr. Claus is a bit OCD? Maybe he just drinks too much coffee. When I make a list, I like to include at least one item that I have already accomplished. Makes me feel efficient. Almost on top of things rather than straggling pitifully behind. See if you can guess how many items on the following list are checked off! Damn. I'm awesome.

1. Drink coffee

2. Make bed

3. Blog

4. Check email and Facebook

5. Get packages sent off!

6. Get Reid to his 1pm appointment

7. Once again clean up that vicious cycle of a kitchen

8. Complete daily crossword. Correctly. In ink.

9. Shower and dress

10. Pick up that short list of items at Wal-Mart

He's Heeeeeeeeere!

2011-12-11T22:08:00.002-06:00

We're not sure when this happened. The moose aren't talking...

...but it seems that the CAP* has been here.

*The dreaded Christmas Anagram Poltergeist

Attorney Aquisition

2011-12-10T17:29:00.003-06:00

I have legal representation! He thinks I have a good case. He is the fifth lawyer I contacted, meaning there were four before him. A brief (haha) rundown:

Lawyer #1: I like to start at the top, so I contacted the premiere law firm in the state that exclusively handles work comp cases. He was interested, but after several weeks of information discovery, apologized for not taking my case. His wife had been diagnosed with a brain tumor. And he's apologizing to me. Because under the circumstances he didn't feel he could do a good job representing me. He recommended a couple of colleagues, so I contacted them.

Lawyer #2: After considerable copying and mailing and emailing of documents, he regrettably informed me that his firm was not interested in my case. Not because it lacked merit, but because it would not settle for a high enough dollar amount for the number of hours work it would require. This firm runs a tv ad where the senior partner looks earnestly into the camera and assures the viewing audience that they are there to help. Which I now react to with a snort and eye roll. He recommended another law firm.

Lawyer #3: Called and left a voice mail. He did not inspire my confidence when he called back. His medical knowledge of my particular injury was at least ten years in arrears. He kept repeating the term objective verification. And wasn't aware there is a difference between motor nerve function and sympathetic nerve function.

Lawyer #4: The one #2 recommended. I called and left a voice mail. He never called me back.

Lawyer #5: I called the lawyer who handled my divorce. Several phone calls and emails and initial advice later, we finally have a productive meeting. I feel hopeful. Six to nine months to resolution, he says. Let the paper chase begin.

Live, From My Back Yard!

2011-12-09T22:01:00.003-06:00

You may remember Edgar, my anatomically correct garden statue. He's been here before, sometimes snow covered, maybe dressed up in a seasonal costume. Perhaps hanging out with attractive, beer-swilling women. Earlier today, Reid noticed that Newton was a little worked up over whatever he was observing on the other side of the patio door. Usually it's not very interesting. Newt gets all in a tither over leaves blowing around. But today was different. Newt had noticed something new! Edgar seems to have acquired a squirrel hat. Like he thinks he's a Team Fortress Two character or something. Kind of a dime store Daniel Boone. All I know is, it was chilly out there, maybe 20 degrees or so. And that squirrel's butt is going to get frostbite before Edgar's head warms up.

Santa Can You Hear Me?

2011-12-08T21:46:00.002-06:00

I do love a Venn Diagram. So a holiday themed Venn has got to be just that much better. Whoever created this, you are brilliant and funny. And Santa most definitely has you on his Nice list. Makes me want to dig out my Spirograph. If I can find it. If I still have it. Santa?

Tolerance

2011-12-07T11:04:00.003-06:00

Please accept this post in the spirit in which it is offered. Which is the spirit of peace, tolerance, inclusion, and appreciation of diversity. Even though it is springing from downright aggravation. So allow me to vent for just a moment. Attention Christians who reside in this country! You do not own the Winter Solstice! Celebrate it as you choose with your traditions and beliefs but do not, I repeat, do not, impose your version of this holiday on everyone else! There. I feel better. There is no mystery to me as to why this time of year is crowded with holidays and celebrations in so many varied cultures and religions in so many locations. From ancient times, man has watched the sky and found significance in the observable changes in the stars and planets and our own beloved satellite, the Moon. Also tied in are the changes of the seasons and the associated activities involved. The cycle of life and the mystery and imagination of what it means to be human. Respect the right of all people to celebrate according to their cultural and spiritual customs rather than labeling a particular practice or greeting inappropriate. There is no right or wrong here. There is no mine is better than yours. There is cultural and religious diversity that should be met with respect and tolerance. We can only benefit from embracing the richness and beauty of our differences.

Note: I should have explained that my source of aggravation was a post on Facebook that read I'm going to say Merry Christmas instead of the more pc Happy Holidays to reflect the true meaning of Christmas. Repost if you agree. The things that rile me up! Oy!

Top Ten on the 6th

2011-12-06T22:11:00.002-06:00

One...Christmas card received!

Two...cats who like to chomp on light strings

Three...trees in my bedroom adorned only with golden lights and pine cones

Four...items backordered at Barnes & Noble!

Five...days til my deadline for getting packages sent, complicated by item Four

Six...delectable turkey pot pies in the freezer

Seven...trees up and decorated!

Eight...days til Holiday Jam!

Nine...December 9th, first real meeting with lawyer!

Ten...when I should have gone to bed

Relapse

2011-12-05T19:33:00.003-06:00

Somewhere around the middle of October, Reg dropped out of Facebook. He said it had become a chore, something he didn't have time for. He hadn't recently posted status updates or any new photos. He informed his three hundred-plus friends that he would be pulling the plug. He complained just a bit that few of his friends acknowledged that post. He said he would return soon but he felt he was a better person for trying to withdraw from this online community. Reg managed to resist the urge to reactivate his account for less than two months time. And how does moi have knowledge of this fact? I happened to be on Facebook last evening sending messages to a couple of friends and ran across a message I had sent him in September, before we had met in person. I couldn't resist. I clicked on his name and, voila!, there was his info page! Reg was back, though I have no idea when he reinstated his account. I also had made a friendship request in September, which he had not accepted before he went offline. Now that he was back, I felt it was appropriate to rescind that request. Feels a bit like our real world relationship. I withdrew what I had offered because he went into hiding. Is it possible that real life shall imitate Facebook? That Reg might resurface as a candidate for boyfriend status? I'm not sure that I would click like for that notion. But there is my old friend BotD. Like I told Reg the most recent time we were together, the only way we'll know is in the living of it. Walk through it and see how it unfolds. I think it's called life.

Jammin'!

2011-12-04T23:21:00.002-06:00

Karen and I got a little preview of Holiday Jam this evening. If you love live music, and you love celebrating the Christmas season and you love a fun night out you will love this!!! If Holiday Jam is playing anywhere near you, I command you to buy a ticket and enjoy yourself at this most outstanding musical event! They'll be here in Brookings on December 14th, and we are fortunate for this. I'm getting tickets tomorrow. And this has nothing to do with the fact that I have a teensy crush on the bass player.

Note to Self...

2011-12-03T11:23:00.002-06:00

Please remember to place the renewal stickers onto the license plates before you go anywhere in the car. Or risk being ticketed, pulled over, or otherwise fined. Since they are right there in plain sight on the passenger seat they ought to be difficult to ignore. But I often miss the obvious. Thank you.

One Found Thing

2011-12-02T20:55:00.003-06:00

Maybe I should move my furniture more often. You know, and vacuum. Because sometimes you find things. Things that cats like to play with. Turns out, Colleen knew what she was talking about. When I moved the dresser in my bedroom, what should be lurking there underneath but three knotted plastic bags (Newt's favorite plaything), two bottle caps (Steinie's favorite plaything), and one large red faceted fake gem. Which has now been glued back onto the pull chain on the ceiling fan. As to Steinie's guilt, if an object consorts with other cat toys, it might just be one, too. Still no word from the black & white photos or the missing cell phone

It Wasn't Me! Really!

2011-12-01T16:32:00.002-06:00

What is that nasty smell? It's decidedly different from the nasty smell of yesterday. Although the location is the same. The laundry room. Which contains all manner of things capable of producing stinkiness. Including, but not limited to, dirty socks. Yesterday the smell was sewer gas. Easily remedied by pouring a gallon or so of water in the floor drain to fill the trap. It dries out a couple of times a year. But today, what is that? Not the washing machine lint trap. Not a dead mouse in the corner. Not any of the various leavings of one of the cats. Hmm. It was not until I tossed a sizable chunk of dryer lint into the trash and was met with a wave of nasty rebounding toward me that I remembered. Remembered that when I prepped the turkey for roasting last weekend, which I do in the laundry room where there is a very large sink, I tossed that little paper bag of turkey innards as well as the packaging for said turkey into the trash! Stinky mystery solved. As for that haybale of dryer lint that was the result of drying a plushy afghan, how is it that there is any remaining blanket after a couple of washings? This mystery remains.

Turkey Gobbler, er, Cobbler?

2011-11-30T19:48:00.004-06:00

Even if I do say so myself, my first attempt at turkey pot pie was a smashing success. I meant to take a picture of it. So lovely and steaming and crispy on top as it emerged from the oven. But it's gone. All gone. Good thing there are six little ones on their way to the freezer to enjoy later. Amazing what you can do with leftover turkey and gravy. I sauteed a sweet potato, onion, celery and mushrooms together in a little olive oil and stirred it all together. After placing about half of this into a baking dish I sealed up the top with your standard pastry crust, crimped the edges and poked some decorative holes. Since the filling was already cooked, it only took about twenty minutes in the oven til the crust was lightly browned. It really was beautiful. As well as delicious. Wish I'd managed to snap a photo. I feel a nap coming on...they're not kidding about that L-tryptophan.

The Count

2011-11-29T23:04:00.002-06:00

Are we counting the teensy ones that sit on top of tables as well as the larger ones that sit on the floor? Ten, tops, I would estimate, however you might count them. Like I always say, decorating for Christmas, it's a process, not an event. And I'll be getting on with that process just as soon as I pack away all those pesky pumpkins and cutesy colorful corncobs. I can't wait to see what I bought on clearance after Christmas last year. Stash it and forget about it, that's what I do. Then eleven months later it's a nice little pre-Christmas surprise. I do love 75 to 90% off.

Progress!

2011-11-28T19:19:00.003-06:00

A white pickup truck pulls into the driveway this morning. It is sporting on its doors the logo of my internet service provider. We rejoice, for the man is here to upgrade us to fiber optic service! He took away our old modem and replaced it with a shiny new gizmo that has pretty lights. It is now possible for Reid to visit Blockland and watch his Brony show at the very same time that I am viewing Netflix! Without pixilation and retrieval issues. I have four out of four on the picture quality scale. Our bandwidth has more than doubled. Which makes it more possible for the occupants of this house to be in separate rooms with our electronic entertainment devices and interact with each other even less! I think this is called hibernation.

That Which Remains

2011-11-27T12:44:00.002-06:00

I am grateful for men who are wonderful kissers. And Reg was most definitely one of them. Note the deliberate use of past tense. As I expect I shall never enjoy that particular pleasure with him ever again. The memory lingers, though, of three most especially. In chronological order, then, the three kisses with Reg that remain with me.

1. First, the first. In his car in the Barnes & Noble parking lot. A little aggressive, it got my attention. His left hand rested on my knee, his right hand lightly on my cheek. I was breathless. In a good way.

2. In the driveway at his house, he was leaving for work, I was leaving for home. He rolled down the window, I leaned in. Sweet. We smiled.

3. On the couch that he hates, after dinner. Prefaced by Reg saying, I meant to do this earlier. I melted into a puddle, never to be the same.

Irrational Pie

2011-11-27T11:01:00.002-06:00

Proof that pie are square. At least around here, they are. Gotta love those corner pieces! I apologize for overuse and perhaps inappropriate use of italics.

Nieces are the Best!

2011-11-27T10:51:00.002-06:00

The best combination of daughter and friend! Megan dropped by yesterday. We had lunch. We talked of many things and caught up on each others' lives. She is headed back home to Wisconsin today. Let's all wish her safe travels.

Shopping in my Pajamas

2011-11-24T13:40:00.003-06:00

Please don't hate me. But I have just now completed Christmas shopping. For this, I am thankful. Go back to your turkey, football and pie.

Satanic Soda

2011-11-23T09:57:00.001-06:00

Proof that high fructose corn syrup is, indeed, spawn of the devil.

The Giving of Thanks

2011-11-22T21:42:00.002-06:00

During the twenty years of my marriage, a sore point was how casually his family threw together holiday plans. Who was hosting, who was bringing what, the communication involved to bring it all together was sadly lacking. I just found out this afternoon that, indeed, a local family dinner has been planned. Two weeks ago, when I inquired of the ex what the Thanksgiving plans might be, he had no idea. Within a few days I decided that in the absence of family plans, Reid and I would have our own feast, just the two of us. Roast a turkey, sweet potatoes, dressing, pies, all the good stuff. As of this afternoon, 48 hours before meal time, my turkey was thawing in the fridge and I had purchased all the necessary groceries for Thursday. I was annoyed. Which was followed by an obvious conclusion. Reid should not be denied the opportunity to gather with extended family just because they have lousy communication skills and I have a turkey defrosting. I'll cook my turkey later this weekend. Reserve my Thursday for baking pies, drinking some wine and hogging the bandwidth. After all, due to my smaller and geographically scattered family, their father's extended family is the family our sons grew up around. I guess I could pout about it. But the reality is that I'll likely spend a fair number of future holidays alone. I need to come up with a new set of traditions to celebrate them, as well as keeping the possibility open to blending my traditions with those of others who may become significant to me. Family is not a static thing, it's a fluid group of people that gains and loses members over the years. So if I'm invited, you can count on me to bring the pie. Trust me, you'll be thankful I did.

Laugh Therapy

2011-11-22T10:45:00.003-06:00

To facilitate the getting over him process, I have discovered laugh therapy. I'm not entirely sure how this idea came to me. Perhaps it has been lurking in the dark recesses of my brain, just waiting for the proper time to reveal itself. In any case it works. I recommend it. First, identify a particular habit or quirky behavior expressed by your former lover. Then, picture them naked while engaging in this idiosyncratic activity. Just try not to laugh. Suppress it until bladder leakage seems imminent. Hold it in as long as you possibly can. Chew on the insides of your cheeks if necessary. When you finally cut loose, it is preferable to preface the actual laughter with a hearty snort. Repeat as necessary. Insert a laugh track or other background noises if you like. I employ Mary Chapin Carpenter's infectious giggle from the bonus track at the end of time*sex*love*. I also imagine Mary Chapin standing there with me, her arm about my shoulders as we snort and guffaw. The support of a girlfriend is always helpful. Thanks, Reg, for supplying me with such an excellent and evocative visual. It may seem like a mean thing to do, but hey, in retrospect I don't know how I managed not to laugh when I witnessed you do this particular thing. Which demonstrates what a kind person I truly am.

Timing, Actually

2011-11-20T19:38:00.003-06:00

I was seized with the desire to view Love Actually. Fortunately, I have it on dvd. I armed myself with a beverage, a munchie and a fluffy blanky and settled into my chair. Just as our story is opening, the subtitle Five weeks before Christmas appears across the bottom of the screen. As it happens, today is precisely five weeks before Christmas. Cosmic. I feel inspired to learn Portuguese as well as how to play the drums. Also makes me wonder what the counterpart for Wisconsin might be for me. Any ideas?

Snowvember

2011-11-20T13:20:00.003-06:00

Almost black & white

That's Vladimir, shivering in the corner of his deck pot under his blanket of snow.

White on white

Country Life

2011-11-19T18:58:00.002-06:00

At Colleen's house, the funky pumpkin gets its own spot to sit. And I helped with the chicken round-up. Then we drank some sangria. I snuggled with Old Red on the couch. Later, I drove home under a clear, clear eleven degree winter sky. I saw Orion and a quarter moon hung among the twinkles looking like a humongous orange segment. And a shooting star. That I wished on.

And So, It Ends

2011-11-19T16:26:00.004-06:00

Truth be told, it fell to me to break things off. Left to Reg it would have been relationship death through attrition. At some point, he would simply have stopped responding to text messages. If I called he would have let it go to voice mail. When asked directly, his reply was that he didn't know what to tell me. That he wasn't able, didn't have it in him, to give me what I wanted. Backtrack a month, when we discussed our wants and needs, we came to a mutual agreement. Just over a week ago he said, we'll run off for a weekend together soon and we'll work it out. My feathered thing flew, stayed aloft, my benefit of the doubt was standing firm. Then, last night, after a week of indifferent and seemingly reluctant communication from him, I needed to know. If we were on or off. What I'll likely never know is what happened to move us off of the same page. Yes, he has a demanding job. Yes, he has some unresolved health issues. It's not the best time for either of us. But you make time for the things and people in your life that you deem important. I felt I had found a kindred spirit. I was willing to take the time to let it unfold, to see what we might become to each other. There is no perfect time to make any big decision. If we all played it safe and wallowed in the negative, there would be no babies or career changes or moves halfway across the country. There would be no castles, no airplanes, no scientific breakthroughs, no great novels, no new achievements of any kind. There would certainly be no leap of faith toward love. I don't know how Reg feels today. I don't really even know how he feels about me. What I do know is that from the moment I saw him smile, I plunged forward with hope and anticipation and an open heart. With no agenda, no snap judgements and (mostly) no fear. So I'm a little sad today. But I remain resilient and optimistic. And perplexed as to why my desire to pair bond with a man is so strong.

Dedicated to Reg

2011-11-18T21:35:00.004-06:00

Oh, you probably won't remember me
It's probably ancient history
I'm one of the chosen few
Who went ahead and fell for you
I'm out of vogue, I'm out of touch
I fell too fast, I feel too much
I thought that you might have some advice to give
On how to be insensitive

Jann Arden sang those words seventeen years ago. I just watched the video. Ironic that we have the same hairstyle. At least I do now, she did then. Seventeen years, hmmm. That's a fashion cycle, right?

Yet Another Pink Appliance

2011-11-18T13:16:00.002-06:00

Just in case any of you were wondering how I accomplished this, or perhaps what was inside this, have I got an answer for you. Allow me to introduce the Solia limited edition flat iron. In pink. Haircut by the lovely Amelia at the Sunflower, smooth by Solia. What more could -ia ask for.

Special Delivery

2011-11-15T15:52:00.004-06:00

Will someone please explain to me how my package got to me more quickly and efficiently when UPS dropped it at the Post Office yesterday afternoon for delivery to me today? Couldn't UPS have simply delivered it directly to me yesterday afternoon? A day earlier with no middleman? Am I making this too complicated?

Lunch, Etc.

2011-11-15T10:31:00.002-06:00

Lunch with Colleen yesterday. Here. Fabulous! The potato leek soup is to die for. I can't wait to return and sample the dinner menu! Lunch out is so much more fun when it's a complete surprise. Colleen dropped by to find me still in my bathrobe! We also shopped. Just a little. Colleen still works part time at the seed lab, my former employer. Work is where we met six years ago, and it hardly seems like it was that long ago. On the other hand, I feel like I've known her my whole life. Maybe even in another life. She said the invites for the annual Christmas party were recently distributed. Her hubby expressed a less than enthusiastic feeling about attending, and suggested Colleen should take me instead! As it happens, he will be going. But the whole idea of me attending after being summarily dismissed from my job there after a year of disability leave sounds like so much fun! Oh, the people who would be riled up by my presence! Tantalizing little fantasy, I must admit. A couple glasses of wine and I'd be in lampshade/working the room mode with everyone. Probably laying it on way too thick with the management and enjoying every minute of their collective annoyance and discomfort. On the other hand, it would have been a very enjoyable opportunity to see so many people who I really like and miss, and in whose company I used to spend some very long days. Always enjoyed the work, always enjoyed most of the people. What I'm left with is the feeling that I would love for this issue of my damaged hands to be settled. For everyone concerned. I'll throw my own little celebration on that day. Which I hope arrives soon. Y'all are invited.

If Everyone Knows, Is it Still a Secret?

2011-11-14T17:25:00.003-06:00

It has just come to my attention, courtesy of the Sandwich Monday gang at Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, that there is a Secret Menu at McDonald's. From which an abomination called a Land, Sea, and Air Burger can be ordered. It consists of a hamburger patty, a fish filet and a chicken patty all on one bun. I don't know about you, but to me it seems to be missing something. There ought to be gravy. Or maple syrup or cheese sauce, perhaps a fried egg on top. Eating this sandwich, or even seeing one in person, is not on my bucket list. Be afraid.

Still My MIL

2011-11-13T13:32:00.003-06:00

When a marriage dissolves, many relationships remain. I will always think of Audrey as my mother-in-law, even though I am no longer married to her son. She was recently in the hospital battling pneumonia and went home last week. Yesterday she returned to the hospital via ambulance after having suffered a small stroke. Reid and I visited her yesterday and I was flooded with memories of my own mother when she was hospitalized a year and a half ago. Astonished by how frail she is, how soft her voice has become. There is still a sharpness and intelligence in her eyes though mostly she rests. She seems to have an awareness of the company gathered in her room. It feels a bit like a vigil though she may very well rally from this latest health complication and return to her home. The likely unspoken question on all her children's minds is will she be able to continue to live independently? Should she continue to drive? I wish her well. And understand so clearly what my ex-husband and his siblings are going through.