Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Wait For Me!

I have fallen in love. With a house. In a small town forty-one miles north of Denver there is a 2 bedroom Craftsman style bungalow. Beautiful built-ins. Hardwood floors. Enclosed front porch. Fireplace. Single car garage and garden sheds. Partially finished basement. Beautiful kitchen and bathrooms. I have already moved in and know where all of my stuff will go. In my head of course. And it's in my price range! Please, please, please, one of you with preapproved financing who wishes to move to Brookings call reloKatie for a grand tour of my house and buy it! Alas, the way the market is in Colorado this house I adore will likely be sold in short order. Sigh. It was lovely while it lasted.

The Needs of the Fan Outweigh the Needs of the Fin

Five dollar bills are being defaced in Canada. Or, rather, re-faced. All I have to say is, Sir Wilford Laurier, seventh Prime Minister of Canada, ought to feel honored. That's his portrait that Star Trek fans are Spockifying with his signature Vulcan ears, eyebrows, and haircut. Others may find this sort of homage disrespectful, but I find it highly entertaining. Don't tell anyone! It's perfectly legal! I know, that makes a teensy bit less fun and rebellious. Live long, and prosper.


Once again, I am a Coke bottle shareable name. But unlike last summer, I am paying closer attention to Coke displays in retail establishments. Speaking of last summer, the graphics have disappeared. I can't imagine why Coca-Cola would object to free advertising. Oh, and they again have a bottle sporting my middle name but I was unable to find an image. Carla Jean is out there. Look for her in a convenience store near you.

Monday, June 29, 2015

Here's to You, Mike, And a Life Well-Lived

Thinking of my much loved brother-in-law Mike who passed over to that other side yesterday. He was Norwegian and raised Catholic so this short film seems appropriate. Mike was gleeful and talented and kind. And a terrific cook. We presented him with an organic smoked pork shoulder for Christmas a few years back and he couldn't have been more delighted. He loved his wife and daughters and adored his grandchildren. He loved fishing and puns and practical jokes and wordplay and music and wearing loud Hawaiian print shirts. He played guitar and knew more songs than anyone. And he would have loved this video.

Saturday, June 27, 2015

Under Pressure

Co-enzyme Q-10. I take a 200 mg capsule every day. I've been doing this for nearly two months. I haven't seen numbers this good for years. Years. For the last two years I have been taking a very low dose of hydrochlorothiazide to lower my blood pressure. It has a list of over seventy, seventy, unpleasant side effects. And it didn't impact my blood pressure one stinking little bit. Turns out all it did was make me pee. A lot. According to the Mayo Clinic, Co-E Q-10 has been shown effective to lower blood pressure in clinical studies. It is a vitamin-like substance produced by the body and is essential for many organ functions and occurs in high concentrations in the first twenty years of life. After that production tapers off. The only listed side effect is that it may cause digestive distress so it should be taken with food. I expected that if I had gone in to see my doc about the lack of efficacy with the hydrochlorothiazide that the next step would have been to place me on another high blood pressure medication. Probably a combination diuretic, and if that wasn't effective then onto a beta-blocker or ace inhibitor or perhaps a calcium channel blocker. Each drug has greater potency and an increased possibility of more and varied side effects. Not a road I wanted to go down. I'm going to continue to monitor my blood pressure and hope my continuing efforts to eat more sensibly and be more active will reward me with an even lower reading. I really don't like the current state of how medical care is delivered! 

My Fave Rainbows

Friday, June 26, 2015

I Heart a Rainbow

Over The Rainbow

I have never before been moved to tears by a Supreme Court decision. But hearing President Obama speak just now about the SCOTUS ruling in support of same sex marriage has opened my floodgates. It is now the law of the land that marriage between a same sex couple must be recognized as legal in all fifty states, with all its rights and privileges. This is a win for equality, a win for civil rights, and a winwinwin for love. Today I am proud to be an American.

Wednesday, June 24, 2015

Everybody Wants to be a Cat

The pet carrier has been dusted off. There is a fuzzy blankie lining the bottom. Einstein has an appointment with the vet in about an hour. I swear it's more traumatic to take a kitty to a doc appointment than it is to haul myself in for medical treatment. He's lost some weight and seems to be in the litter box more frequently than normal. So. Positive vibes, please. Steinie hasn't been in the car for years. Suddenly all I can think of is my sis Martine camouflaging her cat Bear's meds in canned mackerel juice. Bear slupped it up without complaint. Can we can assume from this that stinky fish juice is the cat equivalent to Mary Poppins' spoonful of sugar? I expect so. I wonder if I wish really hard if she'll show up and take Steinie to the vet for me. I really should have made an appointment with Ms. Poppins when I called the cat doc over a week ago.

Monday, June 22, 2015

The Sundays on Monday

A friend posts this video on Facebook when warm weather arrives in the far northern reaches of Minnesota. It's kind of a tradition. A couple of years ago I posted it before he did. He was driven to distraction. I was amused. This year I have had to prompt him to post it. He still hasn't and we are more than 48 hours into official summer. He's toying with me. So I'm posting it here. Either way, it's a terrific song. 

Saturday, June 20, 2015

Happy Birthday, Michael!

My firstborn is twenty-seven today. I am grateful to him for teaching me so many life lessons. That spending time with him, whether it was reading stories or playing or cuddling, was so much more important than if the dishes got washed. He brought out in me patience and delight and love that I had no idea I possessed. Nothing simultaneously humbles you and raises you to a higher place than caring for a tiny, helpless new human. I may have given birth to him, but becoming a kind and loving and remarkable man is mostly to his credit. I am so very happy that he is in my life. I wish him the merriest of natal days.

Friday, June 19, 2015

It's a Boy!

Tis the eve of me becoming a mom for the first time! Which also means it's Michael's birthday tomorrow. Here I am, full sail preggo about two weeks before he was born. With Mom, Sara, and Cullen. So many memories associated with this house! 

Three day old Michael, ready to go home for the first time. He's still sort of squishy and looks like a tiny old man. I was very, very happy. 

Wednesday, June 17, 2015

Christine Miserandino Knows Your Pain

And my pain, probably yours, too. She lives with lupus and describes her journey here. She came up with this very clever idea of how to express the amount of energy she can apply to tasks in any given day given the limiting nature of her disease. My physical therapist and I came up with a way to keep me from overdoing but we unimaginatively used a point system. I don't know about you, but I'm converting to the spoon-based economy as of now. The chronic pain I live with is neurological in nature but spoons apply to all sorts of ouchies. If you are acquainted with another human who experiences pain on an unrelentingly regular basis, read this for insight into their world. If you are one of these people, the list will resonate with you on many levels and validate your, well, pain and its attendant effect on your existence. And on days you feel whiny, just count your spoons and try to be grateful.

Wimpy Hands

When trimming your toenails is an arduous task, you do it on a day when nothing else is on the calendar.

Monday, June 15, 2015

Buy Me

There's this sign in my yard. My house is so unnaturally clean and beige that I'm not so sure I live here. Also, the cats are certain something is up. Shhhhhh! I haven't told them that after more upheaval and strangers traipsing through the house that there is a bonus twelve hour car ride waiting for them.

Sunday, June 14, 2015


Brown Thumb Challenge

In the brightest, sunniest spot in the back yard, I have planted tomatoes. From left to right we have a cherry variety, an early producer of medium sized fruits that resist cracking, and finally, one of those that produces monster sized tomatoes. I'm excited about this, it's been years since I have attempted to grow anything edible. As you can see, I am remembering to water them. This is a step in the right direction. 

Friday, June 12, 2015


So I listed my house today. Let's all cross our fingers hope that this goes fabulously and fast. Everyone say I believe in reloKatie! I believe in reloKatie! I believe in reloKatie! I believe in reloKatie! I believe in reloKatie! Thanks. You're a doll. 

Thursday, June 11, 2015

Let's Be Direct

Just before 10 this morning I received a text message from piton@rotpaygol.ga. As if that wasn't unrecognizable enough, this was the message:

(final St3p)' B2go.li/-s9MZi'BeONroad

Then, a little over an hour later my phone rang. It was a local number so I answered. A tremulous sounding elderly feminine voice asked if I was Anya. I said, no, you have the wrong number. She apologized. When the Mercury retrograde ends around 4:30 this afternoon I expect all of this will make sense.

Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

Benefit of the Doubt

Words From Sunday Night

Need. Want. Sorry. True. Transitional. Love. Care. Asshole. Lose. You. Cost. Control. Vile. Murder. Stasis. Change. Foreseen. Painful. Defend. Dark. Blindsided. Smug. Information. Share. Feel. Feelings. Interfere. Hurt. Knowledge. Answers. Honesty. Who. Why. Story. Apologize. Apology. Depth. Mistake. Before. Secret. How. Work. Known. Protect. Same. Break. Broken. Sad. Opportunity. Opportunist. Power. Repeat. Harm. Never. Always. Trust. Comfort. Hope.

Monday, June 8, 2015

Laundry List That Does Not Include Doing Laundry

1. Finish potting plants.

2. Finish coffee before dealing with plants and pots.

3. Organize crap in garage.

4. In reference to item 3, this must be accomplished so I can put more crap out there.

5. Stay properly hydrated while working on these tasks.

6. Item 5 does not include beer until well after 5 pm.

7. In reference to item 6, I don't care if it's Martine's birthday, adhere to this rule anyway.

8. Remember to be grateful for this day, even if it feels like the shittiest Monday in recent memory.

9. Remember that finishing all of these looming tasks brings you closer to your objective.

10. In reference to item 9, said list of looming tasks is getting shorter and is well decorated with check marks and scribbles and rewrites.


Happy, happy natal day to my little sis Martine. I can't imagine life without you to pick on, plot with, and play with. Love you so very much.

Sunday, June 7, 2015

Ode to Friedrich Nietzsche

I'm not dead. So I must be stronger. At this point I'm fairly certain I could bench press a toothpick. What happened, you say? Once again I have discovered by trial of fire who my true friends are and which ones are best left by the side of the road. I'm still not certain what all the fallout from this tempest will be. A storm not of my own making but somehow I got caught up in the middle of things. Maybe this is simply the occasional price I must pay for living with an open, trusting, and accepting heart. I refuse to armor myself with cynicism and anger. I may land at times in a deep trough of sadness but I know how to climb out. I have learned that the heights where happiness, love, and contentment dwell more than balance out those depths of sorrow.  It seems weird to be grateful that I can experience this range of emotion, particularly when engulfed by dark, somber clouds. If you can't feel the bad stuff I think it's likely you won't feel the good stuff either. And, yessir, I am ready for some good stuff to roll around.

Friday, June 5, 2015

In Honor of Homer Simpson

It's National Donut Day. Celebrate responsibly. The first one of you who brings me a donut will earn my undying affection. Eclipsed only by my confection affection. And why does spellcheck dislike d-o-n-u-t? Maybe because the o isn't precisely in the middle of the word like the hole is in the donut. Dnout is impossible to pronounce as well as being just as unpopular with spellcheck. Go figure.

Nine Lives

Newton and Einstein are nine years old today. Look on their adorableness and feel your intelligence wane! They're still pretty darn adorable. Even the one who engages in extracurricular bathroom activities. Raise your can of tuna in celebration! 

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Close That Window!

A couple of hours ago I got a call on the landline from a fellow who claimed to be a representative at Microsoft Windows. Hmm. I had never heard Microsoft referred to in quite that way but out of curiosity I stayed on the line. He said I had not responded to numerous messages so they found it necessary to call. He continued to talk a line of gibberish that contained the words safety and compromised and infected. I asked him how he obtained my phone number and he responded with "it is in our database". He then instructed me to do some very specific things, first of all to hold down the Windows key and press R which brought up a window labeled Run. He then told me to type in the letters cmd which brought up another window. I suspected he was trying to attain remote access and control of my computer so at that point I asked him if he would provide me with a phone number where I could call him back. He said he would but wanted me to enter a string of characters into the black box first. I asked him if he could hold on for a moment and texted my son Michael and described the situation. He texted back with that could have been very bad! I hung up. So, if a man who speaks broken but polite English calls and asks you pretty much to give him remote access to your computer don't do it! Please be suspicious and hang up. And if you have caller ID on your phone, report him! Beware of scams

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

Oh, the Hypocrisy!

For links to the facts, go here.