Friday, January 30, 2015

January Reflections

January is a month of milestones for me. Happy ones like starting this blog and some truly difficult ones like taking the first steps toward ending my marriage. Ten years ago this day was the calm before the storm. A time of personal emotional turmoil that would land me in a months long period of depression. A dark time followed by counseling that helped me restore order inside my head and in my life. Counseling that helped me recognize my strengths that would carry me through the difficult times ahead. In the last ten years I have lost my two brothers and mother, my twenty-year marriage, a significant love relationship, and endured through the loss of my job after a work related injury and a still unresolved lawsuit. Despite the negatives I choose to continue to focus on the positive things in my life. My two wonderful sons are the best thing in my life, and the elder one has married and given me the best daughter-in-law possible. With the exception of the injuries to my hands and wrists and the ongoing challenges associated with loss of function and chronic pain, I otherwise enjoy good health. I have terrific sisters and friends who are more loving and supportive than I could ask for. I wake up in the morning ready to embrace the possibilities of each new day. And as each day ends, I'm grateful for the small things. Some days it is enough to have held a steaming cup of coffee and breathed in its delicious aroma. To have laughed to the point of having my face down on the table, often thanks to the younger son.  To receive an unexpected text or call that brightens the day. To take a nap with a cat snuggled close by. Who knows what milestones may be accomplished in this year. All I know is, I'm still happy to be here.

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